Maybe good fortune will shine on me as I try my sworn post again. (clicking save draft every couple sentences). It was my birthday. Turned 25. I said I did nothing special, like the rest of my birthdays in recent times. But, I ought to take that back.
I spent my evening with a woman I’m still tripping madly for. I get the feeling it’s the same for her towards me. I dunno. It’s a reminder of renewal.
I left with that in mind. Then I came home and got in touch with a childhood friend. This idea of renewal rolls over. I’m making promises to him to stay in touch more. I hope I do. He doesn’t know his value to me. But it’s there. He’d still be a groomsman at my wedding. Even if he looked perhaps a bit out of place.
I’m actually talking to him in between writing sentences on here and it’s pretty cool, just talking about nothing in particular now. It’s a nice respite coupled with my lovely birthday evening from the recent events that have been going on.
So much going on. Need a new job. But even that might not happen anytime soon. Pro tip, when you quit a company for dissenting philosophy, have an exit strategy. I know so many of you said that, but now I’m really feeling the burn. My last post was supposed to have touched on this. before it went up in flames. (clicking save draft for the 6th time since the start)
It also touched on acceptance. Of things intended but never achieved. I need to be ok with that. I’m still a good person. If I want, they will get done in time. I don’t have any investors or other reason to do them than my own motivation, so I get to make the call and I get to be ok with it.
This could probably be expanded on more if my head was more clear. It’s hurting and I feel slightly dizzy. Anyway. The direction I was trying to turn this post into was a bit different than the intended post before. I wanted to say I’m good. Even with all the stuff going on. Even the no job. I got a girl that I love. I take one look at my problems. Hell, they’re the problems of almost any 25 year old. Bipolar is just playing the smallest of roles.
Yeah, I like my problems right now. I’d take them any day over the old.
So my post ain’t long and it certainly feels vague. But I can finish it feeling satisfied. Because in the end, these words are for me. I like the thought that people can glean something from them on occasion, but they’re only here to help me. And I’m doing pretty great.
Even so, fingers crossed I can maybe get on some sort of writing schedule and get any sort of readers I have on here, caught up on all things me.